As a parent your to do list only seems to get longer and somehow the days seem to get shorter. It is so hard to fit in everything you have to do in one day. As the stress from everyday parenting tasks build it can be easy to get frustrated with our children, especially when we feel like they are not managing their time effectively.
Many children who struggle with their mental health may have a hard time managing their time. Children who struggle with anxiety may feel "stuck" in their own head ruminating on something, which could slow them down from whatever task is at hand. Children who struggle with depression may have a hard time finding motivation to do something, and do it quickly. Children who struggle with ADHD may have a hard time focusing on the task at hand, which makes everything take longer.
Whatever the reason is that your child is struggling we recognize that it can be frustrating for you as their parent. We also recognize that your child will have a easier time navigating the adult world if they are more equipped to manage their time effectively.
Below are the top 3 tips parents just like you have put into practice in their own home to help them help their child manage their time. Not only are these tips helping save parents some stress now they are also making them feel more confident in their child's ability to manage their time in the future.
Utilize technology
Your kids act like you love to nag them but in reality you would just love if they listened to you the first time. One mom shared with us that she was tired of being the bad guy, and she could feel her kids tuning her out. So, she made Alexa take over that role!
She told us that her kids love Alexa and are always talking to her and asking questions. She began using her Alexa app to have Alexa talk back in a way that was beneficial for the entire family. Now when her kids need to get ready for bed mom doesn't have to break that news - Alexa does. And guess what… they listen, usually!
When it's time to get homework started, Alexa lets them know that too. This mom began programming Alexa to keep the entire family on track. If they have a big event they need to get ready for she will set a timer ahead of time and Alexa will give everyone a 15 minute warning for leaving the house.
Her children are taking well to Alexa being "the bad guy" and now she even gets some eye rolls - but mom doesn't (well, not as many as she did). Now when mom has to step in and says something she has a much better chance of not being tuned out. Mom feels like she can be a little more fun and a little less militant with Alexa on her side to remind her children when they need to keep things moving along.
As your children age their respect for Alexa may diminish - however she can still be a tool for parents of older children! Another mom shared with us that she uses Alexa to create reminders for screen time, homework, alarm clocks and so much more!
If you don't have Alexa similar features are offered with Siri and Google home!
2. Help them break up large tasks
Sometimes your child may be overwhelmed with what they have to do and that's why it is taking them longer than you might hope. Especially for children who struggle with their mental health, it can be hard to know where to start on a large task and that may discourage them from even giving it a try.
It is a life skill to be able to look at a challenge or task and break it apart into steps to get it done - a life skill you can help your child learn in the safe space of your home. We know that you are so busy that it can feel trivial to slow down and explain to your child what steps they should take to clean their room, for example. To you it might feel obvious and like you don't even have to think about it.
For them they might look around and feel like they don't even know where to start. Try and use some of the times where you can feel your child struggling to get things done as teachable moments where you can help your child work this out in their own mind. Go in with a positive attitude and gently guide them through the process of getting all the mini tasks done. Give them ownership in the task and ask them questions about what's going on.
Some children may benefit from a very detailed to do list, and that could be an awesome place to start this teachable moment. Create a to do list with them that walks through all of the tasks needed to clean the room. Ask them what they think should be done first - taking the dishes on their desk down to the kitchen or wiping the desk down. Start small and simple and guide them through the process of cleaning a room.
Once you have your to do list you can either send them on their way cleaning (with close by encouragement) or help them work their way through it (age depending). Once every task is done remind them to cross it off their to do list. This visual way of accomplishing small tasks can help them learn how to break down overwhelming things and get them done in a timely manner. It also feels really good to accomplish something so as they cross things off their confidence in themselves and their ability to get things done may grow just a little bit each time.
If your child struggles with depression they may also struggle to keep their room clean. This tactic of having a positive attitude and helping your child break down the tasks of getting their room clean can be so helpful. Sometimes it just feels like too big of a job for them to even start.
Does your child struggle with depression and their hygiene? Click here to check out more tips on how you can help!
3. If your child is a visual learner - try this tool!
A mom told us that sometimes her daughter had a hard time reading clocks. She would point to the clock and tell her daughter things like "When it's 1 o'clock we have to leave." or, "When the big hand gets to the 6 you need to start your homework". Time and time again she would get a little frustrated when her daughter did not listen. Later she learned that her daughter was having trouble reading the clock and she could never tell how much time was left.
This mom did some research and ended up finding visual timers on Amazon. These small and simple clocks help her daughter who is more of a visual learner. Now her daughter can see exactly how much time she has remaining to do something. When mom says start your homework in 20 minutes, she can set the timer and her daughter knows that when the color runs out it's time to start. Her daughter has told her that she likes this way of telling time so much better and she finds it helpful when she can see the time "shrinking".
You can find your own visual timer by searching for one on Amazon, another store, or even check your phone's app store for a virtual one!
If your child struggles with their mental health it can be hard to know how to best support them. These hard earned tips from other parents have worked for them when they are trying to help their children manage their time better. You know your child better than anybody, if you think one or more of these tips will work in your own house give them a try today!
Want more answers to questions like "How Do I Help My Child Effectively Manage Their Time?" delivered directly in your inbox? Sign up today to join our FREE community of parents who know what it's like to raise a child who is struggling with their mental health.